So there I was…thinking of a better title. Having none, I proceeded on to the actual post which began “So there I was…”
Breaking out of that infinite loop, let me discuss email and it’s proof of Darwinian evolution. See, I’ve been getting some wierd emails lately. Subject lines don’t really make sense. Hey, I do it all the time, right? So no big deal. Then I remember the Shakespeare/Monkey analogy of evolution/ probability (it’s just that good, so it’s been used in fields of related study). You should open that previous link in a new window/tab (ahhh, the day of the slashies). The best is Stanley, 1995.
Now that we’re all caught up on the ideas upon which I am referencing, let me go on to examples. I don’t think they’re up to par with famously dead people yet, but they’re working on it. In fact, I’ve even coined a term for it: Darwinian Spam. What to do when two good things appear? That’s right- combine them. Here’s what our culture has been lacking. We got a good start with the peanut butter and jelly in one jar thing, and probably the ketchup and color green thing but we can’t stop there. So there’s evolution as made popular by Darwin (and several court cases ). And then there’s email spam of the ilk of jalapeno and radish sandwiches at 2:30 in the morning. Exiting.
So combine them into Darwinian spam! Yeah!!!! Here’s what’s really been showing up in my inbox:
Author: Subj:
Garland Stanford or hygiene documentation
Jerry Keyes Away marquette scarecrow
Jewel Hinson on dumbbell bugaboo
Adam Waters Reuben in carleton
Arthur Low mort’gage rate
Patsy Mansfield Before pneumatic and reman
Stevie Connolly may epistolatory gao
Burl Mcdowell Bianca not virgin
Anastasia Sorensen Doctors Use This Too qd4QsS
Elvis Lutz Looked ballard arrack
Leola Quintero and cartographer burglar
Boris Oneill Carlton it’s episcopate
Vilma Tidwell Could scarce a patina
See?! This is undeniable proof that somewhere out there, monkeys with names like Burl McDowell and Boris Oneill are getting progressively closer to the ultimate goal- sonnets.
And speaking of monkeys and email: You’ve got Monkey-mail!